Worst. Fiction. EVER.

  • GJSchaller
  • GJSchaller's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
  • Character is to a person, what carbon is to steel.
  • Posts: 10421
  • Thank Yous: 1379
02 Jul 2009 22:13 #1 by GJSchaller (GJSchaller)
Worst. Fiction. EVER. was created by GJSchaller (GJSchaller)
James, whatever you do, don't start your book with any of these openings:

www.bulwer-lytton.com/2009.htm


Lord Gideon Weaveforger of Kaladonia
Steward of Elvalion
OOG: Geoffrey Schaller
  • Gallion
  • Gallion's Avatar
  • Administrator
  • Administrator
  • Posts: 5566
  • Thank Yous: 2677
02 Jul 2009 22:38 - 03 Jul 2009 08:08 #2 by Gallion (Gallion)
Replied by Gallion (Gallion) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.

"Folks say that if you listen real close at the height of the full moon, when the wind is blowin' off Nantucket Sound from the nor' east and the dogs are howlin' for no earthly reason, you can hear the awful screams of the crew of the "Ellie May," a sturdy whaler Captained by John McTavish; for it was on just such a night when the rum was flowin' and, Davey Jones be damned, big John brought his men on deck for the first of several screaming contests."


This is EXACTLY how my book about the Inverted tower starts! This is such &#*@(*& I cant believe this guy plagiarized my first sentence!!!!



- James C. Kimball Director, Knight Realms
Last edit: 03 Jul 2009 08:08 by .
  • Simon
  • Simon's Avatar
  • Administrator
  • Administrator
  • Posts: 287
  • Thank Yous: 125
03 Jul 2009 01:15 #3 by Simon (BigZ)
Replied by Simon (BigZ) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.

OOG: Nick H.
-Officer
  • Lina Marinescu
  • Lina Marinescu's Avatar
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
  • Only the curious have something to find
  • Posts: 588
  • Thank Yous: 78
03 Jul 2009 07:46 #4 by Lina Marinescu (Ismaesumi)
Replied by Lina Marinescu (Ismaesumi) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.
James, I'm ashamed that you would write such a run on sentence... I thought you were better than that! ;)

IG- Lina Marinescu
OOG- Katie M.- Lead Monster Marshal

The stalwart soul has the will to live and is eager for the race ~Taylor Caldwell

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • Magnus
  • Magnus's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
  • In fearful Day, In Raging Night...
  • Posts: 1040
  • Thank Yous: 483
03 Jul 2009 08:13 #5 by Magnus (hippy g0th)
Replied by Magnus (hippy g0th) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.

Towards the dragon's lair the fellowship marched -- a noble human prince, a fair elf, a surly dwarf, and a disheveled copyright attorney who was frantically trying to find a way to differentiate this story from "Lord of the Rings."
Andrew Manoske
Foster City, CA


copyright attorney = best P.C. ever

Matthew Majchrzak

ST

Lord General Magnus

"Not Dead Yet!"
  • Bladesworn
  • Bladesworn's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
  • Posts: 1941
  • Thank Yous: 238
03 Jul 2009 13:47 #6 by Bladesworn (Bladesworn)
Replied by Bladesworn (Bladesworn) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.

Towards the dragon's lair the fellowship marched -- a noble human prince, a fair elf, a surly dwarf, and a disheveled copyright attorney who was frantically trying to find a way to differentiate this story from "Lord of the Rings."
Andrew Manoske
Foster City, CA

copyright attorney = best P.C. ever


If you follow this logic, then the debate of Pirate vs Ninja has just been ended.  Ninja wins... because ninjas don't care about copyrights or attorneys.  ;)

IG: Tyran Radley
Vassal of Alisandria
OOG: Paul Y.
  • THENPC
  • THENPC's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
  • Assassins Do It From Behind
  • Posts: 1185
  • Thank Yous: 126
03 Jul 2009 14:55 #7 by THENPC (THENPC)
Replied by THENPC (THENPC) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.
It's true... the proof is here!

Adversus Nox Noctis,
Sir Lethias Discretion Nathaniel Peregrin Christopher Wrathchild VonRitter
Knight of Travance
Putting the Shiv in Chivalry Since 1202

Mortem facit omnes aequales, vitam facit omnes fratres
Vince The NPC;
RM, RPM, ST
  • Odo Garaath
  • Odo Garaath's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
  • Back and Ready For More!
  • Posts: 1968
  • Thank Yous: 12
05 Jul 2009 20:13 #8 by Odo Garaath (Odo)
Replied by Odo Garaath (Odo) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.
How about that Norm H guy?

"Praise be to Enax, and blessing to his followers."

(Tom Senger )
  • geezer
  • geezer's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
  • Posts: 4349
  • Thank Yous: 448
05 Jul 2009 23:22 #9 by geezer (geezer)
Replied by geezer (geezer) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.
I do so love them.  Thanks for posting Geoff.

"Piracy - Hostile takeovers without the paperwork"

Edwin Haroldson
Loremaster
Master of the Mages' Guild

An ethical person does the right thing when no one is watching.

OOG - Charlie Spiegel - Kitchen Marshal

"War is a matter of vital importance to the State..."
  • JoDios
  • JoDios's Avatar
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
  • That guy with the muffin hat.
  • Posts: 717
  • Thank Yous: 0
08 Jul 2009 10:13 - 10 Jul 2009 09:03 #10 by JoDios (JoDios)
Replied by JoDios (JoDios) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.
Remember James, periods are your friends.

OOG: Jo
Last edit: 10 Jul 2009 09:03 by .
  • hecknoah
  • hecknoah's Avatar
  • Junior Member
  • Junior Member
  • Posts: 78
  • Thank Yous: 0
08 Jul 2009 18:07 #11 by hecknoah (hecknoah)
Replied by hecknoah (hecknoah) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.

Remember James. periods are your friends.


Shouldn't that be a colon?

Noah
  • geezer
  • geezer's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
  • Posts: 4349
  • Thank Yous: 448
10 Jul 2009 00:53 #12 by geezer (geezer)
Replied by geezer (geezer) on topic Worst. Fiction. EVER.
comma

Edwin Haroldson
Loremaster
Master of the Mages' Guild

An ethical person does the right thing when no one is watching.

OOG - Charlie Spiegel - Kitchen Marshal

"War is a matter of vital importance to the State..."
Moderators: Lois Heimdell (LoisMaxwell)
Time to create page: 0.523 seconds