How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?

30 Jan 2008 21:29 #1 by Jacob Kanane (Jacob Kanane)
How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight? was created by Jacob Kanane (Jacob Kanane)
www.howmanyfiveyearoldscouldyoutakeinafight.com/

I can't get the html code to work right on the forum for some reason. But it's predicting that I can take down 26 five year olds, can anyone beat it?

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30 Jan 2008 21:41 #2 by Atrus (Atrus)
Replied by Atrus (Atrus) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
34
quote: "To hell with morality, I'd be too busy pile-driving, crane-kicking, and bare-knuckle bashing them all the way back to kintergarten"


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30 Jan 2008 21:43 #3 by Odo Garaath (Odo)
Replied by Odo Garaath (Odo) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
I got 23 last time I took this.

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30 Jan 2008 22:22 #4 by Bladesworn (Bladesworn)
Replied by Bladesworn (Bladesworn) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
I got 26.

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30 Jan 2008 22:36 #5 by Quin (Quin)
Replied by Quin (Quin) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
........


....28?
[size=3pt]...i dislike children[/size]

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30 Jan 2008 23:04 #6 by Mother Rosa (Kate)
Replied by Mother Rosa (Kate) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
Haha, I only have 23, I can't beat on little kids mercilessly.

Jon got 26 though, he's okay with it.  :D

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30 Jan 2008 23:56 #7 by McDermitt (Matt Quagz)
Replied by McDermitt (Matt Quagz) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
I'd like to say you could fill the court with 5 year olds and I could take every last one down with one punch or kick each. But if they rushed me, they may trip me and then pile on top of me and jump up & down until my internal organs ruptured and skull split against the pavement.

I think I could be violent and fast enough to keep taking them out tho (a full court of 5 yr olds). The dead/unconsious bodies would form a sort of barrier around me keeping the others at bay.

Even if they rushed me & got me down I think I could recover & get back up, snapping a few more necks and gouging out several sets of eyes in the process.

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31 Jan 2008 00:04 #8 by Elyse! (Elyse!)
Replied by Elyse! (Elyse!) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
I got 20, which still strikes me as an awful lot... for me, at least.

I guess when it comes down to it, I bite and scratch kinda nasty style.
And have been trampled.
... And am totally not okay with the Zerg.


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31 Jan 2008 00:17 #9 by Damien (Damien)
Replied by Damien (Damien) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
32!?  That's it!?  Damn my small stature!  I was almost certain I could take at least 50  >:(

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31 Jan 2008 00:46 #10 by Father Zahir al Nawar (Zahir)
Replied by Father Zahir al Nawar (Zahir) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
This is totally wrong. 31??? Now using my own kids as a test along with their friends, I totally got more than 31 of the little....

Never mind.

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31 Jan 2008 01:53 #11 by Secarius (Secarius)
Replied by Secarius (Secarius) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
38.... probably a good thing im not a kindegarten teacher huh?..

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31 Jan 2008 04:38 - 31 Jan 2008 04:41 #12 by Tim P (OrganicGolem)
Replied by Tim P (OrganicGolem) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
34... lame, in that scenario I personally think if you put me in the room with enough 5 year olds that we were all shoulder to shoulder I could take them all.

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31 Jan 2008 09:43 #13 by Erdrick (Erdrick)
Replied by Erdrick (Erdrick) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
I think 39 is the cap, I personally got 28.

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31 Jan 2008 09:57 #14 by Jacob Kanane (Jacob Kanane)
Replied by Jacob Kanane (Jacob Kanane) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?

I got 13  :-[  and i thought I was putting some pretty mean answers!  what were you guys writing to get so high ?


Fighting experience & body type plays into it a lot. I have 0 fighting experience outside of KR.. but I will tower over those 5 year olds and crush them with my long lanky arms.

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31 Jan 2008 10:19 #15 by Inajira (Inajira)
Replied by Inajira (Inajira) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
For all those people who are saying you could take every single 5 year old in that room, think of it this way:

Even if there's just 35 kids in that room, that makes 35 sets of teeth, 70 fists and 70 feet.  I'm fairly certain that numbers alone would crush you at some point.  Also, height is a huge advantage for the kids (the fact that they're so small).  They're all going to be punching you in the knees/lower legs and all grappling you around the same.  The only advantage you would have is if you stayed on your feet, however once those little hellions get you on the ground you are so dead it's not even funny.  Also, to strike at the kids with your fists, you'd need to bend over, which is a huge disadvantage.  Kicking isn't really all that smart either, since that means you'd have to lift one of your legs off the ground giving the kids an opportunity to knock you to the ground, where the kids reign supreme.

Why do I feel like I'm in the Hill's kitchen with Ralph and Brendan right now...

For the record, I could take 23 according to this site, although I believe that number is erroneous and it's probably far closer to 10.

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31 Jan 2008 10:32 #16 by McDermitt (Matt Quagz)
Replied by McDermitt (Matt Quagz) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
5 year olds probally can't throw a punch for shit

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31 Jan 2008 10:39 #17 by Inajira (Inajira)
Replied by Inajira (Inajira) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
No, they probably can't.  For those of you with young nieces/nephews/brothers/sisters/whatever how many times have you gotten tripped up when they run up and hug your leg(s)?  Personally, whenever my 2 and a half year old godson runs up behind me and hugs my leg, it trips me up real bad.  Now immagine 30 kids doing that to you.  Once you get on the ground, you're going to suffer a lot from stomping, biting, scratching etc.

Also, no matter how hard they punch, I can't immagine getting hit by 30 kids at once being at all pleasant.

I'd take 30 five year olds over one Tim Ponjican any day of the week.

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31 Jan 2008 10:50 #18 by McDermitt (Matt Quagz)
Replied by McDermitt (Matt Quagz) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
Its only gonna take one smack to take each one out.

I could take at least 100.

my strength is already far superior than 99% of men in the world

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31 Jan 2008 11:48 #19 by LStarling (Kwildar)
Replied by LStarling (Kwildar) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
I don't quite understand how little old me can take out 26 of 'em... But sure. I'll take the number. ;)

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31 Jan 2008 12:54 #20 by Tamzyn Worthington (shimmershadow)
Replied by Tamzyn Worthington (shimmershadow) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
This quiz just makes me think of the time my dad got pickpocketed by a swarm of French orphans in Paris.

I can take out 22...I think I might get my Red Cross Babysitter's Certification taken away for even thinking about this (if it wasn't already WAY expired).

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31 Jan 2008 13:06 #21 by
I could take 31. I used to fight all the time. I have pretty much no moral compass <- my friends will def back me on that. Yeah I have excellent (soccer) balance and can take several five year olds hanging on my legs and jumping at me.  I would like to put this scenario into practice.
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31 Jan 2008 13:10 #22 by McDermitt (Matt Quagz)
Replied by McDermitt (Matt Quagz) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?

. I used to fight all the time. .


BAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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31 Jan 2008 14:54 #23 by Atrus (Atrus)
Replied by Atrus (Atrus) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
You know even if they got you on the ground, i think my ground game is far superior to a 5 year old's, the problem with them piling on you is that they only weigh so much, and once they are on you, i dont' think more than a few would be able to hit you since your surface area is now partially protected from the bodies on you.

However, are these kids biting?  Are they going for blood?  Are they pathogen zombie kids or possibly 28 days later children?  I think those would be the ultimate "X" factor.

In wich case my number falls to 3, if pathogen zombies, I think I could fight the good fight but eventually there zombie bites will do me in.

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31 Jan 2008 15:55 #24 by Inajira (Inajira)
Replied by Inajira (Inajira) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
Even if your ground game is superious, the average five year old probably weighs around 40 pounds.  If just 5 get on you, that's 200 pounds at various places on your body.

Also, bear in mind the sheer numbers advantage.  Wounds and weariness will being to take their toll on you while you beat on those kids.  They have 30 kids to supplement their ranks.  When one falls, a fresh one takes its place.  When you fall, they're probably going to smother you with PlayDough.

Absolutely they're going to bite, they're not zombies though.  They are out for blood just like you are, I'd have to assume. 

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31 Jan 2008 16:18 #25 by Birnum Pyre (Birnum Pyre)
Replied by Birnum Pyre (Birnum Pyre) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
I am inclined to agree with Wally on this one when it comes to sheer numbers. Have you ever had to look after children, just chasing after them is tiring. They have inordinate amounts of energy especially when they get excited or in this case a taste of the bloodlust.

Think of your typical red light green light scenario, you have 30 kids coming at you and you call red light. The first moment one of them gets it into their head to keep going, the rest hop right on the idea. 5 year olds don't go by experience or aim for vitals they are pack creatures. They thrive only on your fear and pure animal attack instincts.

And don't even bother trying to play the easter bunny isn't real card, because then you have gone from being the enemy to being the destroyer of worlds and we all know what happened when the Stay Puff marshmallow man stepped to NYC, just cause you have size doesn't mean the little guys won't turn you into your component goo. You will only release their ferret like fury. Just think of a riot now put it at the hight of your knee caps and you tell me you have a better ground game and you are throwing good punches when you have a 40 pound thing clinging and gnawing at your arm while you are left to wonder that even should you survive if you will ever walk again.

5 year olds don't know where the line of decency is... They haven't learned it yet.

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31 Jan 2008 16:58 #26 by Gregor (Caleb)
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36




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31 Jan 2008 17:22 #27 by Daedri (Daedri)
Replied by Daedri (Daedri) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
Im completely serious when I say this. I had this dream in several variations of me being attacked by small children in my high school gym. There were hundreds and they were bloodthirsty.  Basically the same  scenario.

I think I could take out several hundred personally. I have been a babysitter and spent plenty of time in a kindergarten in NYC because my ex girlfriend taught there. Children can quickly overwhelm you , so in a normal situation I would say even the strongest most athletic person could stop 10-15 5 year olds in their tracks before they were overcome by the weight and nut punches (kids love this move)

I say that I could take out several hundred because the first kid to reach me would get picked up by his hair and I would bite into his neck and rip it out, killing him stone dead in seconds, the other kids would most likely flee in horror. Disemboweling the first child and throwing guts at the other children might also break their attack.

Plenty of battles will prove that shocking ruthlessness and speed can demoralize your opponent faster than overwhelming numbers. Im pinning my hopes on eating the first childs heart , dances with wolves style.

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31 Jan 2008 17:31 #28 by Tim P (OrganicGolem)
Replied by Tim P (OrganicGolem) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
the simple reason I said I can take out that many is this: after a while it becomes a stamina game... only so many can even harm you in any way once there is like 10-20 around you. I would prefer to stay on my feet to lower the number of combatants Id have to deal with, but I would actually fight better on the ground... likely taking another kid down every 3 seconds.

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31 Jan 2008 17:49 #29 by T. Grumblegut (Yngwie)
Replied by T. Grumblegut (Yngwie) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
I agree with Wally.

Also, keep in mind that most males have a particular place between there legs that has a 99% chance of getting hit by a swarm of 5 year olds. Be realistic... if that happened you would be done.

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31 Jan 2008 18:11 #30 by THENPC (THENPC)
Replied by THENPC (THENPC) on topic How many five yeard olds could you take in a fight?
But the quiz specified that everyone was wearing cups. That, to me, is the key factor.

30, by the way  ;D

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