Need A Poem Written? Hire Jack Dimms!

Hello one and all! With the day of Love coming up quickly in Travance there are quite a few love birds out there who may not know the exact words to use to their beloved. That is why for those who cannot read or write, I am willing to sell my wit with the pen and parchment to those who simply cannot find the words to describe how intensely their love burns.

If anyone is interested, leave a posting here or send me a private missive to me in Arnwuhl. I am willing to work with anyone, and my prices range based on how many lines you want and how intricate you wish your poem to be.

Til then, continue loving Travance.

Signed, With Truth,
Jack Dimms.

**This is written without a named signature!!!**

Roses come in red
Violets, sometimes blue
Who the hell would pay
For poems done by YOU?

-There is a fingerprint made of blood representing a signature at the bottom of the parchment-

Ah very witty, allow me to reply.

Roses most certainly come red
Like the blood dripping from your head
Cause if I find who ever wrote this
I'm sure they'll wish they were dead.


Signed, With Truth,
Jack Dimms.

Mr. Dimms,

I do not know when I will be in the proper next, but I will find you and speak about the creation of a poem I have in mind. Unfortunately, a gift with words does not run within my family.

F. Sinclair

Splendid Miss Sinclair!

I should be there in April so hopefully we get a chance to speak.

Signed, With Truth,
Jack Dimms.

Hey Jack,

How is someone who can't read or write supposed to send you a private missive or read this ad?

Best of luck,

Caldor

A simpleton scratches his words on paper
Blissful in his ignorance
No muse to guide his hand
Blindly reaching for meaning
And finding naught

Befuddled
A drunkard spilling his ramblings on the page
Ale pouring useless from a broken tap
A fool playing at wisdom


S

I'll have what S is serving.

R.S.

I can't believe I'm writing this, but well done Jack. You're doing Andorra's work. There might be hope for you yet.

Jack Dimms is my truest test of willpower.

-Eicks

[strike]5 Gold to the First Person who writes me a poem about the dire rat and the Dimms.[/strike]

I almost did something unclassy.

R.S.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Jack Dimms is in love with a rat
Well, how about that?

-Merikh

I had a poem,
I really did,
But then I decided that if I really wanted to insult Jack Dimms I'd do it to his face so he could properly fight back and try to prove me wrong.

- Ava

I have no problem fighting him if he wants......I just wanted the 5 gold
-Merikh

Your poem was easily worth ten gold. If I find five more gold I shall give it to you for your artistic endeavor.

-Ava

Don't be quite so hard on jack, he's trying to learn to be a skald. Encourage him instead. Or make me unhappy with you. Whichever suits you better.

I see there are still low opinion of me. Don't worry about them Grimm. There is no use in staining your hands with such...... filth. I will prove them all wrong. Not by force, but I will show them all just how intelligent I am. So go on and keep disrespecting me. All those disrespecting me in this posting are those I could care less about. They will see me in a new light one day, then they will respect me. Eventually I'll rise to a noble title and most of those jesting will have to bow to me. Thank you very much though Cousin, I'm glad there is opinions out there that I've changed.

Signed, With Truth,
Jack Dimms.

Jack, we will respect you if you can show that you are worthy of our respect. Stating your intentions to rise to nobility and seeing those who have once jested you bow before your feet only makes you look pretentious and vain. These statements allow people to make fun of you. You let down your guard, and now you're being struck. If you want these jests and jibes to stop you have to change yourself so you do not look pompous, egotistical and even dim. Do something that can truly be considered noble and respectable and I, and many of the people in Travance, will see you in a whole new light. Hell, I'll even write a poem about it.

-Kanas

Kansas,

I have been doing that. I've been working with the Chronicler closely, conceded to a women in honor combat, I don't take heads anymore, and even with this posting as the good Father said I am doing Andorra's work. Granted Razael wouldn't agree but that is besides the point. I have been making huge strides from where I was and still I am the subject of many jests even though I have proved how smart I am and how restrained I've become. I will act vain because simply put I am tired of trying to get all of Travance to like me. So those who feel they need to insult me even when I'm trying to do something good are beneath me as even if I became a great hero they would still been stuck in the past and insult me. It is beneath my time to worry about them so I'd rather give them a snide remark then work on those who truly value my skills like Miss Sinclair, Grimm, Father, and the like.

Signed, With Truth,
Jack Dimms.

Then keep on making strides.
-Kanas

P.S. My name is not Kansas. It's Kanas

One should not aspire to adopt the mantle of nobility so they may put those from their past under foot. One should aspire to be nobility to serve the people in a greater capacity. That is what we are. Servants of the people.

Jack Dimms,

Perhaps a sample would stop the naysayers. Perhaps something on the coming of spring to lighten hearts and show what you can bring?

B. Drexel

Jack,

I was not intending insult, but tying to help your business.

Caldor

**No named signature**

Thank you for your harsh, violently written poem.
I will treasure it.

-Bloody fingerprint with a smear running towards the corner-

Ah, a lot of postings to answer. Well, let's get started. Caldor, I did not take what you said with offense. Matter of fact you are right and I was going to post back to explain deeper in ways people without the ability to write could as word of mouth spreads and they coul get someone who they trust to missive me in order to write something for them.

As for Miss Drexel I will write one up and show them in my next posting.

Sir Cypher, Yes and this is true, at the same time though someone could end up in the dungeon for insulting you. You command respect. It'll be a long ways til I can make a run for becoming a noble I know that fact. But in time the naysayers shall see.

Signed, With Truth,
Jack Dimms.

(Written on semi-fancy looking parchment, though the handwriting is pretty dismal)

Untitled

The winds howl to the new coming of season
Where we have fought through war, and death, and pseudo-treason
I have believed in this season for quite some time
As spring has come forward and to that so has time
It is now time to love, time to lust, time to clean
Time to embrace nature and all the beauty you can see
Beauty unmatched like the soft cheek of Miss Drexel
Catching a glimpse of the sunset as you stand next to
Your lover or mother clutching upon a family saked treasure
So take a deep breath in because Spring is here for our pleasure.

Signed, With Truth,
Jack Dimms

Not bad. Keep working at the craft and you'll be a skald yet. Try some kennings next time.

I agree with Grim here. Not bad though I had to chuckle that you included the old salt soldier that I am in there. I see some potential there though I'm no scholar for such things. I read it and reacted which is what any artist wants. Good luck Jack Dimms!

B. Drexel