HEADS WILL ROLL!

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26 May 2015 01:28 #1 by Jack (Keeperofdice)
HEADS WILL ROLL! was created by Jack (Keeperofdice)
Lords and Ladies, Lads and Lasses, and all manner of person and beasty in between:


The Bloody Stump will proudly be kicking her doors open with unnecessary force once again.


Thirsty from running from screaming horrors in the night?


Hungry from hours of fighting all manner of creature that crawls up from the ground?


Willing to accept that water is a thing in privies and not something we have behind the bar?


Then come on down to THE BLOODY STUMP!


We decapitate the competition by cutting our prices to the bone. (Only figuratively, because we cannot legally say otherwise).


Napkins and plates available at request. For a nominal fee of ten gold pieces. (This ain't Loez.)


Opens whenever we wake up from being blackened out from the previous nights festivities!


Cards, Darts, and all manner of Gambling.

Sea Shanties Nightly.

HELP ALWAYS WANTED.





The Bloody Fare


Pancakes
It's pancakes. Make them one of your well rounded meals for the day.
5 Silver Each


Scrambled Eggs
Enjoy unborn baby chickens swirled into a primordial ooze and cooked to perfection
2 Gold


Toast
Bread that was not quite burned. We can do that, as we are trying to keep arsonists off the streets.
5 Silver


Crownhurst Muffin
Eat them fast while you can, if you don't, they are prone to strip mining everything nearby.
1 Gold


Bacon
Meat from a pig. The sizzling when it cooks, are tiny screams of deliciousness.
2 Slices for 1 Gold


Breakfast Platter
2 Pancakes, Eggs, Strips of Bacon, and Toast or a Crownhurst Muffin
5 Gold


The Jonas Kane
A cigar, glass of champagne, and a Crownhurst muffin. Start your day in style.
20 Gold


The Haroldson
A pound of apple-smoked bacon, a dozen scrambled eggs, 10 pancakes, a half gallon of Orange juice from the isles of Rinnquinell, and the self satisfaction you can afford this meal, and keep us employed. Proclaim to all of Kormyre that your bank account and appetite are limitless. The Haroldson includes a complimentary potion of Greater Refreshment.

1000 Gold or 500 Gold worth of Gold Bars stamped with the letters: E.H


Rat Sausage
Rat that we caught while feasting in a shack on a hill. Tenderized and rolled into a link
1 Gold


Dog Meat Patty
He was my favorite. Now he can be your tummy's favorite.
2 Gold


Hydra Sausage (Gator)
Meat taken from the Hydra itself. Come on, you know you want to try it!
50 Gold


The King's Dear Steaks
Do you dare to dine on the king's dear deer.
25 Gold


The William Montgomery
Two king's beef patties smothered in Amon-zur cheese, wrapped in bacon, and crafted with just a touch of Brazen.
10 Gold


Baby Kraken (Lobster)
Only the manliest of men can muster the money to mount this magnificent meal.
100 Gold


Sweet Corn
Corn gently roasted on a grill slathered with butter, cut right off the vine with our sharpest guillotine blades.
5 Silver


Regular Pressed Coffee
Like the thumbs of small heretic children, this coffee is expertly pressed.
5 Silver


Tiramisu Pressed Coffee
Pressed coffee offering pleasurable flavors that succubi are hard pressed to match
5 Silver


Vanilla Pressed Coffee
This is pressed vanilla flavored coffee, there is no joke or pun here, support the Bedouins. Smoke at Zahir's
5 Silver


Exotic Teas
Acquired Teas from the far corners of the world. Treat your palate to questionable flavors.
5 Silver


Gwenyd's Pick Me Up
A minor healing infused elixir guaranteed to wet your whistle.
2 Gold


Dr. Maxwell’s Medicinal Tea
A moderately sufficient healing infused beverage with a slight tang.
4 Gold


Simon's Restorative Juice
A savory drink of outstanding restorative ability. It tastes a bit like pie and mushrooms or feet and copper.
7 Gold


Galen’s Healing Brew
The most potent of healing brews that will fill even the most hearty of warriors with life force.
15 Gold


James's Field Sedative
When on the move and needing to survive multiple daggers placed in ones kidneys, enjoy this amazing solution.
2 Gold


Yoshimatsu's Irongut Draft
A swig of this hearty brew will give you the rippling rock hard Abs that Yoshimatsu himself uses to crack walnuts.
2 Gold


The Wife-dodging Draught
One sip of this ghostly light beverage and you'll find yourself transparent, perfect for dodging the Misses.
10 Gold


Cypher's Solution.
To be a true hero, you don't need to be a powerful mage or an accomplished warrior. You just need to chug one of these.
8 Gold


Zelriches Far Reaching Elixir
This goes down as smooth as a rusty gauntlet from a new galadronian orc's fist bursting through your chest.
2 Gold


The Darkwood Infusion
With but a few sips of this tart yet simple drink you will be filled with supernal clarity and all will be known.
4 Gold


The Guillotine
This drink is almost guaranteed to knock you on your Keister.
5 Silver


The Ballad of the Tavern
A potent potable that will restore your mind, body, soul, or spirit.
2 Gold


The Omni
Find yourself refreshed with amazing power. The Bloody Stump is not responsible for anything you do after you drink.
20 Gold


The Elixir of Immortality
Eternal life or your money back guarantee, created by Alchemist Luven Crozik 1149-1202
1 Silver


Mug o’ Grog
Drink at your own risk. Dr. Maxwell does not advise drinking this if you are pregnant, sick, not a Satyr, or sane.
1 Silver


Chardonnay
A luxurious white wine from the finest vineyards in Londwyn
10 Gold/Glass 50 Gold/Bottle


White Zinfandel
A fruity red wine. Yes. I'm quite aware it says white. But trust me it's a light red. Almost pink.
10 Gold/Glass 50 Gold/Bottle


Cabernet Sauvignon
A hearty red wine it's like drinking the blood of your enemies without dying from poisoning.
10 Gold/Glass 50 Gold/Bottle


Champagne
Celebrate in Style with chilled Champagne
10 Gold/Glass 50 Gold/Bottle


The Ming
The tiny brother to the Xander. Still pretty big. Drink it in 3 Minutes and it's free and it gets named after you instead! No spilling or tossing your cookies.
10 Gold


The Xander
It’s GIGANTENMOURMASSIVE. Yes it's a word. Drink it in 5 minutes and it's free and it gets named after you instead! No spilling or tossing your cookies.
20 Gold


- Jack

Ser Jack Siefer
Knight Of Drega'Mire
Head of Research & Development of Kormyre
Sky Marshal
Captain of the K.A.S. Tarrasque

OOG: Gus M.

“Men learn from their failures. I prefer to learn from the failures of others..”
"Sometimes what the world doesn't need is a hero. Sometimes what it needs is a monster."
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